Banana Slices
by Katraa
Summary: When the world of Symphonia is introduced to these earth substances called 'Banana Slices', everything goes haywire! [ kratos x yuan] [others]
1. Banana Slices?

Welcome the my original story, Banana Slice! For some reason Zelos has this bizarre liking to Earth's Banana Slices. Once he gives them out, everyone becomes obsessed. Sounds interesting? Well you better believe it. My story has no romance, some language, and LOADS of humor! No offense to any person I offend by hurting their favorite character or making their favorite character act really odd. Well hope you enjoy! This isn't well written with detail, this is just to make ya laugh, I hope. Before I forget! Lucky come here, kitty!

Lucky: an orange tabby kitten enters Meow?

Me: Do my disclaimer pwease?

Lucky:…rrr-eow?

Me: Fine I'll do it! I don't own anything I write about. The people who made it up owns it! Like Namco!

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**Banana Slices**

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Chapter One: Banana Truck

"Watch out you idiot!"

With a yelp, Tethalles' redheaded chosen fell to the ground with a thud. Thick red hair fell on the ground of Meltokio. Arising to his feet, Zelos looked around.

"Who knocked over the Great Magnificent Zelos?" He inquired, well really demanded. His eyes scanned around. He shrugged and continued on his daily walk to see his hunnies. Passing the Inn a cart on wheels went by him.

"Nice cold Meltokio Banana Slices! Just in from a faraway place called Earth!" A salesmen dressed in some peasant clothes called out pushing the cart. Zelos grinned and thought to himself.

_Banana Slices? Is that some kind of perfume to attract more hunnies to you?_

His mind went a hundred miles an hour with brilliant ideas, well, Zelos Ideas. He walked over and put his elbow on the cart.

"How much do they cost?" He asked twirling his red hair.

"Ch..osen!....The Banana Slices?...there…there free!" He spoke passing Zelos about five banana slices. The poor mans eyes looked around in every direction.

"Thank you," Zelos chimed walking away. Still walking, he looked down at the "Banana Slices".

"Well what do you do with these things? Do you eat them? Do you wear them on your fingers? Do you put them down your shirt?" He asked to himself. He laughed out loud with thoughts of their purpose. Deciding they must be food, he chugged one into his mouth.

A pleasant, no delightful feeling came over him. He screamed out with glee and began to jump up and down which was rather bizarre for even Zelos.

"THESE ARE TERRIFIC! THEY ARE ALMOST AS GREAT AS ME!" He declared as everyone's eyes set upon their Chosen. Not knowing what to do, they each grabbed a Banana Slice from the man's cart. The all almost had the same re action as Zelos.

Soon everyone in Meltokio was buzzing about these "Banana Slices". The man who was selling them was sitting his big old pile of gald.

Zelos exited Meltokio with the slices in hand. He grabbed his Rheiard he just so happened to get from the Renegades and decided to go see his old buddy, Lloyd.

After awhile he made his way to Slyvarant, then he arrived at Iselia. He banged his fist on the door.

"LLOYD! BUD! OPEN THE DOOR!" Zelos bellowed one fist banging, and the other holding his delectable dainties.

The hazel haired swordsman opened the door and starred at the older man.

"What do you want?" Lloyd grunted starring at Zelos munching away. Zelos' eyes widened as he stuffed a Banana Slice in Lloyd's mouth.

Lloyd, having the same re action as Zelos, began to run around his yard jumping up and down. Zelos pleasantly watched him.

"These are great? Where the heck did you find these?" Lloyd asked begging for another.

Zelos chucked him another one.

"Their from a place called…" He recoiled a minute pondering the place name. "Earth" he declared. Lloyd nodded.

"Let's go find the others and give them some!" Lloyd blurted out. Zelos grinned and nodded.

"AND GO SEE SOME OF MY HUNNIES!" He spoke in a stance. Lloyd, who usually who slap him, got in the same exact pose as Zelos and yelled out,

"HIYAH!"

**Author's Note:**

**Wow that's exciting! What can two Banana High, girl loving men do?... A lot Next chapter ASAP! Oh, and some guy called Taylor Garvis owns, Delectable Dainties! **

**Bye!**


	2. Melt

**Chapter two is in, er quickly! I don't down anything I am writing **

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**Banana Slices**

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Chapter Two: Melt

Lloyd and Zelos continued on their so called 'journey' to enrich both worlds with these so called tasty treats. Their first stop was Colette and Sheena who were having a party in honor of Sheena's accomplishment of being the new head of Mizhuo.

"So where are we going first Zelos," Lloyd asked in a hyper voice. He seemed to bounce up and down as they walked.

"Ah, nice question. We are going to see Colette and Sheena," He announced holding the Banana slices in hand. The chocolate covering them slowly melted in the Chosen's hand.

"What the," he yelled out dropping a slice to the ground. Lloyd looked over and saw the slice drop. Everything seemed in slow motion.

"Nooooo!' Lloyd yelled out jumping through the air and grabbing the banana slice and popping it into his mouth. The tasty chocolate melted instantly.

"Whoa," Zelos observed as Lloyd stood up. Zelos gave a grin to the younger swordsman.

"Well, we know how to get Lloyd to confess to something," Zelos murmured half to himself and half wanting Lloyd to hear. Lloyd didn't really care about the rude comment.

So they continued on, past Izoold and finally to Iselia. Zelos stood in front of the run down city. To him, it looked run down but to Lloyd it was home.

"What a wreck," Zelos spoke walking into the town. Lloyd ignored him and continued down the dirt streets to Colette's home.

Lloyd banged on the door to his dear friends home. His eyes watched the wood door waiting for it to open. Minutes passed without a single sound. Zelos walked mext to Lloyd and tapped on the door a few times. His eyes glamed with excitemnt. After another few minutes Zelos became outraged.

"How can they ignore the Great Zelos?!" He bellowed swiping his hand in the air barley missing Lloyd's brunette head. Zelos stomped his foot and tapped on the door again.

"Who is it?" A voice finally called out. Both Zelos' and Lloyd's faces filled with excitement. A bit too goofy excitemnt though.

"The Great Zelos and his trusty sidekick," Annoucned Zelos before Lloyd had anything to add to his declaration. Zelos waited for the door to open and a lovely hunny to greet him. Well half of what he thought was correct. Within a minutes time the door flung open and smashed into Zelos' beautiful face sending him into the flowers. Lloyd burst out laughing.

"Serves you right," Sheena spoke standing in the wood frame of the door. With a roll of her eyes she turned to Lloyd.

"And what may I ask are you two doing here?" She demanded. Her black hair dangled down to her shoulders. She placed her hands on her hips. She made fists in case either one would say something stupid.

"Well Zelos and I found these excellent treats called Banana Pices," Lloyd spoke with one in his hand. Zelos arose to his feet and stood next to Lloyd.

"It's Banana _Slices _you bafoon,"Zelos spoke thumping LLoyd on the head. The swordsman cowered his head.

"And what the heck are they?' Sheena asked staring at the slices in Lloyd's hand. She reached over and took one curiosuly. Her eyes scanne the fruit to be sure the two weren't playing a trick on her.

"What's that Sheena," A voice called out. Colette walked out from another room and stood next to Sheena. Her crystal eyes starred at Lloyd as she clasped her hands together/

"Lloyd it's you!" She spoke cheerfully. Her face beet red and she grinned at him.

"Well duh," Lloyd spoke rolling his eyes. He obviously was having side effects from the Banana Slices.

"That's no way to treat a lady!" Zelos spoke wacking Lloyd on the head again. Lloyd glared over at Zelos almost ready to kick him hard.

"Like your any better?" Sheena asked Zelos rolling her eyes.

"That hurt my dearest Sheena," He spoke with puppy dog eyes. He gathered his thoughts and passed Colette a Banana Slice. Colette starred at the fruit dumbfounded.

"And you do what with this?" She asked holding the fruit. Lloyd was on the verge of cracking up.

"You eat them," Zelos called out laughing out loud. Both girls starred at the iggnorant pair. Both of them exchanged glances then at the same time stuck the fruit in their mouths. In less then ten seconds Colette burst out.

"THESE ARE DELICOUS!" She yelled out as the chocolate melted in her mouth. Sheena followed Colette's complimant with a punch in the air. She was alittle to ethuastic.

"These are great! Give me more Zelos! I'll do anything!" She yelled out almost jumping in his arms. Lloyd and Colette both had sweat drops.

"Well well then my hunny. Anything you say?" He spoke with a wink. Lloyd glared at Zelos and gave him hs well deserved whack. Sheena stood back up and snatched a Banana Slice from Lloyd. Quickly she stuffed it in her mouth.

"Where did you find these?' Asked Colette with her usual smile. Lloyd shrugged as he looked over at Zelos who was re collecting his thoughts after his brutal assualt.

"Found them in Meltokio," Zelos spoke proudly as he popped one into his mouth. Yet again, the chocolate melted.

Colette bursted out laughing. All eyes fell on her. Her eyes filled up with tears as she contiuned to laugh. If anyone didn't know any better it would sound like she was evil.

"What's so funny?" Zelos demanded acting like a girl. He even had that 'whatever' look.

"I...don't..know!" Colette yelled out almost on the floor laughing. Lloyd starred at her and snarled.

"Calm down you freak," He bellowed. So here it was. Sheena was a mindless happy girl, Zelos was starting to act like a girl, Colette was having out bursts and Lloyd was a stuck up brown noser. The affects of those dread Banana Slices.

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**Author's Note:**

You like this chapter? I tried to make it the best I could. I still am laughing at the fact Zelos started to act like a girl. Just picture him with a purse Please review and feel free to email me at to talk or erm, for any suggestions or concerns. Well Ja Ne for now!


	3. Chocolate Hot Tub?

**Author's Note: Well anyways let's continue on! And remember, I don't own TOS duh 0.o

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**Banana Slices

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**Chapter Three: Chocolate Hot tub?**

Colette starred at Lloyd. Tears filled her baby blue eyes. Sheena looked at Lloyd and smacked him.

"How dare you make a lady cry!" She yelled giving him a good whack. Colette continued to weep. Zelos starred at the swordsman and placed his hands on his hips.

"Who cares?" Lloyd demanded crossing his arms. The other three starred at him shocked. Zelos rolled his eyes and placed a shoulder on the blonde chosen arm.

"Shhh, my little angel, it'll be alright," Zelos spoke. Lloyd, who usually who care a big deal, ingnored Zelos and ate another Banana Slice. Once again the chocolate melted causing a different reaction in Lloyd this time. His mind converted into a twisting hunny filled dream land. All he was thinking about was girls in beach outfits!

"Lloyd you ok?" Colette asked dumbfounded. Her eyes watched him oddly. Lloyd leeped up and hugged Colette tightly.

"Your the most beautifulest girl in the world," He spoke squeezing her tightly. Colette blushed more and thought to herself_ I like this lloyd much better then..the old..one _She stuttered in her thoughts. Momentarily Lloyd had moved away from Colette and to Sheena.

"Hey hunny," Lloyd spoke with a large wink. Sheena lip locked him as Zelos stuttered.

"Whatever!' He spoke in his girly voice. Colette stood there, still clueless. For once she didn't know what was going on. She rocked on her feet and watched the two make out.

"Zelos what are they doing?" She asked concerned. "Are they doing CPR?" She asked. Zelos fell over laughing. He rolled over into the flowers. His face turned bright pink as he laughed harder. Sheena and Lloyd didn't care who was laughing as they made out.

"Zelos, are you dead?" Colette asked poking him in the face. Zelos stood up and brushed himself off.

"Flowers, have to love them!" He spoke in a girly way. He really did look femine in a way. I mean with those pik clothes and red hair, he could me mistaken for a woman!

"What are 'flowers'?" Colette asked. Zelos starred at her.

"Are you ok hun?" He asked. It wasn't as in 'hunny' it was as in a girlfriend in a way. Like two best friends would say to each other.

Colette nodded and watched Lloyd and Sheena. Zelos snorted and grabbed the two with both his hands.

"Time to go see Presea and Regal!" He annoucned as he walked on. So they went on the Rheiards(SP?). Of course they had enough for everyone but Sheena and Lloyd insisted on sitting with each other on one. Half way to Altamria Zelos looked back and saw Sheena and Lloyd making out again. Zelos sighed and flew on.

When they arrived at Altamria they parked the Rheiards and entered the gorgeous city. Colette walked close by Zelos like a lost puppy as Sheena and Lloyd still stood next to each other.

Before they got to Larenzo(SP?) company building, Zelos noticed a large hottub by the beach. His eyes filled with excitement.

"Anyone up for a Chocolate Hottub?" He asked the others. Three quick nodds argeed as they went to change. Colette was the first to come out. She wore her regular clothes seeing she had no clue what a hot tub was. next was lloyd who wore, A speedo!? That's right! A speedo! Then was Sheena who wore her Queen of the Beach outfit. and finally Zelos. He came out waltzing.

"Zelos!" Lloyd stammered staring at the Chosen. Zelos nodded. HE WAS WEARING A BIKINI!

Everyone starred as Zelos got in the hottub and dropped a few banana slices in to make the water chocolate like. Colette sat next to her, I mean him, and still Lloyd and Sheena remained next to each other.

"Why is Zelos wearing a bikini?" Sheena whispered to Lloyd.

"Don't know, Don't care, kiss me baby!" Lloyd spoke as the too kissed again. Colette watched them.

"I think those two need to see a doctor," Colette observed. Zelos burst out laughing as his bikini filled out with chocolate water.

Colette sighed as she ran her hand in the warm chocolater water. She cupped her hands and took a sip.

"This tastes good!" She exclaimned contiuning to eat. Zelos starred at her concerned.

"Hey Colette, don't eat the water!" He yelled pushing her up from the water.

"What's water?" She asked tilting her head. Zelos starred at her wide eyed.

"Nevermind," he excliamned turning back to Lloyd and Sheena.

"Would you two cut it out?" He yelled as his bikini jiggled(:D) Zelos gave them a stern look.

"Whatever," Lloyd said escaping Sheena's grasp and sitting uncomfortabley in the hot tub. Zelos nodded as Sheena sat down next to him. She was about to lay a kiss on him when she saw his bikini.

"WHAT THE!?" She yelled withdrawing and flipping over. Colette giggled and Lloyd shook his head. What a life in a Chocolate Hot tub

Author's Note:

I have nothing to say but RR


	4. Return

Author's Note:

Chapter four is in! Yes Chapter four! I'm so tired and I can barely see to write this. My mind is in like a haze. I'm trying to update both this and Sweet & Sour. So much to do in less then an hour. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I hope It'll be well written

Nall: Kat it's 10:50 PM :rolls eyes::

Kat: So? Who cares? My dad is asleep!

Nall: What if your typing wakes him up?

Me: Then I shall get my hot tub on wheels!

Nall: Whatever.

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**Banana Slices

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**Chapter Four: Return**

After awhile the group decided that the hot tub was getting to wet, soggy, and cold. Zelos was the first to get out. His bikini clung to his chest. Lloyd starred at Zelos suspiciously.

"Tell us again why you are wearing that thing?" Inquired Lloyd with a dis-approving scowl. Sheena nodded along with Lloyd.

"Cause it expresses my outer and inner beauty!" He ranted towards the two..

"Sure thing Zelos," Lloyd murmured. Sheena tried not to laugh. Zelos cast wondering gazes around the group.

"Hey where is Colette?" He asked looking around. Lloyd still couldn't concentrate with Zelos wearing that 'thing'.

"Don't know," Sheena spoke shrugging her shoulders.

"They're no help," Muttered the red-headed chosen. He shot worrying glances around Altamaria.

"Colette?" He called out beginning to walk away from Sheena and Lloyd and into the open. What a horrible idea.

"Mommy, why is that man wearing a bra?" A little girl asked walking by on the street with her mother. The mother shot a glance at where the child was pointing. The mother called out with shock.

"My goddess! Put some clothes on boy!" She spoke in shock. Her face turned pale as she hurried her young one away from Zelos.

Zelos stood there, dumbfounded. Didn't they appreciate her, I mean his feminine, not manly beauty. What was he anyway?

"Zelos?" A weak voice called out. Zelos sharply turned around to see Colette huddled in a corner against a wall. Her face was pale and her clothes were wet. She had her angel wings out and her arms crossed.

Zelos hurried over to Colette, worried.

"Where, who am I?" She asked swirling her head around. Zelos starred at her. Slowly the Banana Slice affect wore off on Zelos. He starred at Colette and shrilled out in dis-belief.

"Colette my angel, why in Martel's sake are you all wet and cold!?" He asked flailing his arms. There was where it hit him. Like, like ::insert hilarious scene of Zelos being toppled over by a bulldozer:: a bulldozer!

"WHY AM I WEARING A BIKINI?" Zelos shrilled out in alarm. His eyes glimpsed around at the wandering people who glared at the man.

As rapidly as he knew how, he hustled into the hotel and into a spare room, and put on some clothes. He scurried back out to where she rested.

"Zelos, your back," Colette spoke with a warm smile. Obviously, the affects of the chocolate wore off on her as well.

"Yea"

"Where were you?"

"Getting changed"

"Why?"

"WHY!?"

"Yea, why?" Colette asked dumb founded. Her cerulean eyes watched Zelos.

"Cause I was wearing a damn bikini," Zelos whispered in the young girl's ear. Hearing that, a wave of laughter eroded from the seemingly quiet girl. Zelos gawked at Colette. _Sure it was funny. The Great Zelos Wilder in a bikini, but why the hell won't she stop laughing!? _Zelos thought to himself.

"Colette it isn't that funny"

"Yes it is"

"No, it isn't,"

"Yes it is!" Colette hollered at the Chosen. She seemed more childish then ever. What happened? Didn't the Banana Slices affects wear off? I guess not.

"Colette, stop being foolish, and help me find Lloyd and Sheena," Zelos retorted.

"No!" Colette howled as she stuck her tongue out at the swordsman.

"Fine whatever"

"Whatever"

Zelos began to walk away. He had to find he others before they did something **really **stupid, like jump of a cliff. Zelos chuckled at that thought. He continued to walk on the streets when he noticed a group of people huddled around a corner.

"What the?" The Chosen asked himself. He walked over and to his surprise, Presea and Regal were putting on a magic show.

"Presea?" Zelos asked ignoring the blue haired guy.

"One, two, three, PRESTO!" Presea yelled out as two white doves flew out from her black cloak and onto Regal's head. The crowd burst out in laughter.

"And that's the end of our show," Regal announced. He was wearing something different besides his usual clothes, he was wearing a magician outfit! Zelos stared at both of them as the crowd walked away.

"Don't tell me, you had Banana Slices didn't you?" He asked shaking his head.

"Yes, but why Zelos?" Presea asked.

"Cause those things have weird effects on people" Zelos explained to them.

"Come again?" Presea questioned.

"They make people loopy," Zelos spoke. He knew the girl would give a definition of loopy in her next sentence.

"YAY loopy!" Yelled out Presea. Zelos took a step back as he watched Presea run about hugging random people.

"What the heck is wrong with her?" Zelos spoke sweating.

"_Ain't no lie, baby bye bye bye_!" Regal began to sing. Zelos just stood there. He was surrounded by idiots.

"I gotta get out of here!" Zelos spoke turning his back and fast walking back to the entrance to the city.

Lloyd began to walk off. He noticed Colette hiding in the corner.

"Colette?" He asked. He had turned back to normal finally. Colette, also was back to normal, again.

"Go away," She cried as she buried her head into her arms.

"Colette?" Lloyd asked walking over.

"I said go away!" She yelled crying louder.

"What's wrong?" Lloyd asked sitting down next to her.

"Just go away Lloyd, you, you Zelos," She spoke, not looking at Lloyd.

"Zelos?" Lloyd spoke clueless.

"I saw you and Sheena making out. Don't try to fool me Lloyd Irving!" She spoke lifting her head up. Tears poured down her face.

"Hey, Colette. I don't remember doing that, but if I did I'm sorry," He spoke placing a hand on her shoulder.

Zelos spotted Lloyd and Colette. He sprinted over, his red hair flapping in the wind.

"There you two are," he spoke panting. He looked at them.

"You guys are back to normal, right?" He asked. He seemed worried that they would act like complete idiots again.

"Yea," Lloyd spoke, not certain what he meant by "back to normal". Zelos smiled and looked at Colette.

"Stand up my tiny angel, I wouldn't want you to sit a corner alone," He spoke with a grin as he reached to help Colette up. Lloyd's face burned red as he stuttered a few words.

"Zelos," He muttered angrily. The Chosen didn't seem to hear.

"_This loves taking its toll on me,_" Regal sang as he ran up and down the streets holding a banana for a microphone.

"What's up with him?" Sheena asked walking over. She smiled at everyone, she also was back to normal. Her eyes watched them.

"Sheena, your back to normal!" Zelos exclaimed trying to hug her. Sheena quickly avoided his hug.

"Zelos!" She spoke angrily as her hair fell down her side.

"And why is my hair wet?" She asked feeling how damp her hair was. Zelos and Colette exchanged looks and laughed to themselves. Lloyd and Sheena were clueless.

"And what's so funny?" Sheena asked.

"Nothing," Zelos spoke lying. She grinned at her then looked around, searching for Presea.

"Where's Presea?" Colette asked looking for Zelos. Her crystal blue eyes watched the streets. Less then a minute, Presea appeared and screamed.

"BOBALOO!"

The group exchanged glances as they all had sweat drops. Even Colette was stunned. She smiled and trotted over to the younger girl, I mean older…

"Presea, you ok?" She asked beaming down.

"YOU SMELL LIKE FISH!" The pink-headed girl screamed. Lloyd starred at Presea and walked over to Colette. He bent over and sniffed her hair.

"You kind of do Colette," He spoke.

Sheena stared at him and smacked him.

"Shut up Lloyd!" The ninja demanded.

Suddenly, Presea turned back to normal. She seemed at peace again.

"Why are you all here?" She asked. She smiled at them then looked alarmed at their sudden appearance.

"I think Presea is ok now," Zelos stated the obvious. Sheena glared at him the turned her attention to Presea.

"Never mind Presea, glad to see you back to normal," Sheena spoke smiling widely at her friend. The girl nodded, a bit clueless on what they were talking about.

"_Bye bye, bye bye my baby bye bye_!" A voice called out. They all turned to see Regal pretending the banana was a guitar

"This is going to take awhile," Lloyd spoke as he lowered his head.

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**Author's Note:**

Presea is very annoying and Regal is acting like a singer. You like the ideas? I won't tell you what happens next, but it might be the last chapter or second to last


	5. The Rebel

Chapter five is here! My friend still has no clue that I'm the one writing this. She is so clueless - No offense Michelle :D Anyways, hope you like this chapter. It's basically focused on Regal singing, so please me prepared for the worst

Nall: You're making Regal the center of attention?

Me: YEP!

Nall: Great…

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**Banana Slices**

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The Rebel

Colette starred blankly as Regal ran off. Her crystal eyes watched the maniac exit. She grabbed Lloyd's arm and whispered into his ear.

"We have to do something," Colette spoke gently. She seemed very worried about her friend. It wasn't like Regal to go off singing. What was wrong with him?

"We can't" Zelos spoke up. The group turned their attention to him. Presea stood next to Sheena happily humming.

"Why not?" Sheena demanded. Usually that idiotic Chosen was wrong. So he was probably wrong about this also.

"Cause the Banana Slices have taken affect on him, there's no stopping him until they wear off," Zelos spoke. He seemed to be speaking proudly.

"How long will that be?" Lloyd asked Zelos. His hazel eyes watched the red-headed Chosen.

"Well, seeing it took two hours for me and three hours for you and four hours for Sheena, I would think six hours for Regal," Zelos spoke thinking math in his head. Colette counted in her head.

"Why not five hours?" Colette questioned looking over.

"Cause it will take Presea five hours for hers to wear off," Zelos declared. He looked over at the axmen.

"Presea when did you eat those Banana Slices?" Sheena spoke bending down to her. Presea starred blankly at Sheena.

"Er, um.. potatoe?" The girl spoke swinging her ax. Sheena jumped backwards as sweat fell from her face.

"You try Zelos," Sheena insisted pushing the red head up to Presea. Zelos grinned and nodded. He beant over to Presea's eye level.

"When did you take that Banana Slice, hunny?" Zelos spoke looking into Presea's eyes.

Presea starred at Zelos.

"Five hours ago, why Zelos?" She asked. Everyone gave a sigh of relief. Her reply was complex and normal. They had worn off.

"Are you ok everyone?" Presea asked setting down her ax and staring at them.

"Yea, we are," Lloyd spoke reassuring the young girl. Colette nodded happily while Sheena stood in amazement at Zelos.

"Stupid show off Chosen," Sheena spoke crossing her arms.

"No need to be jealous my voluptuous hunny," Zelos spoke looking over at her. Sheena's face turned red as she blurted out.

"Why in Martel's sake would I be jealous?" Sheena demanded. She looked down and stomped her feet.

"We better find Regal," She spoke. She seemed like she wanted to get of the 'jealous' theme that Zelos had began. Her eyes glistened as she looked about. She turned to Lloyd to see if he agreed with the idea. Lloyd nodded as the others did also.(add detail)

"Right, who knows what Regal can do," Lloyd spoke worried. In his mind he had visions of Regal jumping off a cliff into the ocean. Thinking of that made Lloyd worry more. His hazel eyes starred at Presea then Zelos. Hopefully they would help the group find Regal before he did something he regretted.

"Right behind you," Zelos spoke. He got in a weird stance as he raised his arms and placed them around Presea and Colette's necks. "The quest of Zelos and his hunnies to find Regal," Zelos chimed. Colette and Presea smiled meekly and escaped his grasp. Zelos gave a whimper then turned to Presea.

"I don't know what might happen to Regal or us, but I'll help," Presea spoke smiling at Lloyd. She had one of those caring smiles on her face. She clutched her ax once more and watched Zelos who was looking at the sky. Presea sighed then looked towards Colette.

"Of course I'll go!" Colette spoke clasping her hands together like she usually did. "I would never forgive myself if something happened to Regal because of us" She spoke in a determined way. Her stubbornness was something that set her aside from the other girls in Lloyd's mind. Lloyd smiled at them all and he made a fist.

"Then it's settled. We have to go find Regal!" Lloyd spoke exchanging glances at the others. Again, they each gave a nod. So they were off. There first hint was when they asked a local if they saw Regal anytime today. A person said they saw him run away from Altamria.

"I was fearing that," Lloyd spoke lowering his head. He gave a huge sigh as Zelos walked over. Zelos had one of those 'Don't-worry-bud-Zelos-is-here-for-you' faces.

"Don't worry bud, Zelos is here for you," Zelos spoke placing his arm on Lloyd's shoulder for encouragement. Lloyd gave a shocked look that Zelos had read his mind. Shaking off the feeling they continued on their quest to find Regal. As soon as they left, they saw Regal huddled in a corner near the woods.

"Look it's Regal," Presea said pointing as she and the others landed their rheaird.

"Regal, are you ok?" Lloyd spoke jumping off his and walking over. The others did so and followed Lloyd. Regal glanced up at them and grabbed Lloyd by the shirt and starred into his eyes.

"Anytime you need love baby I'm on your side," Regal sang as he flailed his hands in the air. Colette giggled under her breath as Zelos grabbed Sheena shoulder for support as he burst out in tears laughing. Sheena, who rarely found tings funny, joined in with the laughter. Presea cracked a weak smile at Regal and Lloyd. Lloyd glared over at the group and scowled.

"It's not the funny," he spoke, beet red in the face. He cheeks were the shade of an apple and his eyes were slanted as he exchanged angry glares at them all. Sheena smiled and took a deep breath.

"Regal, listen to me, your under the spell of Banana Slices," Lloyd spoke taking a deep breath as he explained what was happening to the president. The others stood there hoping Regal would come back to his sense. Lloyd starred into the man's eyes waiting for a reply.

Regal stood up and grabbed a banana from his pocket and began to sing into it.

"_One banana two banana three banana four! Daylight come and me want to go home!_" Regal sang dancing around. His blue haired bobbed everywhere as he magician outfit swayed in the wind. The whole group was stunned, but that soon faded as they began to burst out in laughter. Regal was never this funny!

"Regal, is funny," Presea spoke smiling widely. She held her ax gently as she beamed towards Lloyd. Sheena nodded.

"I agree with Presea," Sheena spoke grinning. Her eyes fell upon the Chosen.

"Yea, Regal is a stand up comedian!" Zelos spoke holding his stomach as he bent over laughing so hard. The others starred at him and gave a bizarre look. Zelos looked over, gave the how-cold look and stood back up.

"So what can we do?" Sheena asked watching Regal run about in circles like a little dog.

"Let's tie him up and keep him as a pet!" Colette spoke clasping her hands together. The group starred blankly at her and gave confused looks.

"Ok then," Lloyd spoke ignoring Colette's idea. She loved dogs, but come on! Regal as a dog?

"Maybe we should take him back to Meltokio and wait till the effects wear off?" Zelos purposed. He gestured for Regal to come over.

"Regal, do you want to come with us?" Colette asked as Regal bounced over hugging a banana.

"_Shut up just shut up shut up,_" Regal sang in a girly tone. Colette took a step back offended. She lowered her face and spoke sadly.

"Sorry," She spoke solemnly.

"Hey, don't be so cruel to her man!" Zelos spoke placing a hand on Colette's shoulder.

"You're a home wrecker!" Regal; sang in a country accent. Zelos, like Colette, was offended and took a step back and collected his thoughts.

"What does that mean!?" Zelos demanded.

"Come on Regal, just be quiet and come with us," Sheena spoke walking over to the others and where Regal was.

"I feel pretty, oh so pretty!" Regal spoke skipping around. Sheena covered her mouth with er hand and a sweat drop rolled off her face.

"We're doomed," she spoke lowering her head as she gave a huge sigh. Lloyd walked over to the three who just failed. Presea walked alongside him.

"Come on Regal! This isn't funny anymore," Lloyd demanded in an aggravated tone.

"F if for friends who do stuff together, U if for you and me, N is for anytime and anywhere at all, down her in Teth'alle!" Regal sang putting his arms around Lloyd's and Zelos' neck. He then danced around jumping into patches of flowers.

"That was…disturbing," Lloyd countered joining the group who had failed. The only one left was Presea. She gently placed down her ax and walked over to Regal slowly. She observed what he was doing then spoke up.

"Regal, let's go back to Altamria together," the girl spoke extending her hand. She had a happy but emotionless face. She starred at the man hoping he would accept. Regal glanced up at her.

"You and me! Me and you!" Regal sang hugging himself. Presea stared at him and trudged back over to the others. They gave hopeful looks but soon Presea spoke up.

"This is a lost battle," She declared with her head sunken low. The others gave sighs and watched Regal continue to bounce around Zelos stood straight up and got everyone' attention.

"Maybe we should knock him out?" Zelos asked.

"Good Idea!" Lloyd answered.

"I have to agree also, Zelos!" Sheena grinned.

"Sounds good," Presea spoke smiling.

"So, who's going to do it?" Lloyd asked.

"Not me," Sheena declared.

"Not me either," Zelos chimed in.

"Well, not me either" Presea answered.

"Sorry, but not me either," Colette spoke looking at Lloyd.

"Fine, I'll do it,' Muttered Lloyd taking a branch and walking over to where Regal was.

"One, two three," Lloyd counted as he gathered some of hi strength and smacked Regal upside the head.

* * *

To be Continued - 


	6. Another maniac?

Author's Note:

Great suggestion! I shall add Yuan into this somehow… ::thinks:: Maybe I'll make him have a hankering for tuna XD Anyways, thanks for all the reviews XD I hope to continue this for many more chapters, since I'm going to add all of The Tales of Symphonia cast, It'll be much longer. Thanks for convincing me my friends ::smile:: Oh and before I forget, NALL!

Nall: What know? Can't you see I'm busy trying to get you to where you meet me in Lunar 2?

Me: Please do my disclaimer?

Nall: Fine. Katra owns nothing she is writing. She's just a helpless lunatic.

Me: …… On with the story!

* * *

Banana Slices

* * *

**Chapter Six: Another maniac?**

* * *

Regal fell to the ground with his tongue out on the ground. Little yellow birdies flew around his head as his mind blanked. Lloyd starred at what he just did and smiled. Presea and the others walked over. Stunned by what they saw, no one dared to speak. Lloyd was the first to speak up from the silence.

"Well he won't hurt himself know," Lloyd spoke blushing a dark red. He scratched his neck and felt guilty.

"But you knocked him out!" Sheena barked back at Lloyd. She gave a hug sigh and turned to the knocked out ex conflict.

"Sheena is right Lloyd," Presea spoke walking up to Sheena and regal. Her eyes darted from Lloyd to the fallen Regal.

"I have to agree with my hunnies on this one, you didn't need to knock him out" Zelos chimed in waltzing over. He frowned at Lloyd and then hugged him around the neck.

"But no hard feelings bud," Zelos spoke with a smirk as he let go of Lloyd. Lloyd groaned.

"Zelos…"He muttered angrily.

"So what now?" Colette asked joining the others. He had a worried look on her face. Her baby blue eyes starred at Lloyd. He knew, somehow, that Colette wasn't that happy. Lloyd gave her a weak smile and turned to the rest.

"I purpose we take him with us and go see if anyone else is under this weird spell," Lloyd spoke making a fist. He turned to the others for support. They all gave their approval and hauled the fainted blue haired man onto Lloyd's Rheaird.

"Why do I have to share a Rheaird with him?" Lloyd whined turning to Sheena.

"Cause you were the one who knocked him out," Sheena answered hoping onto her Rheaird. Zelos and Colette did the same along with Presea.

"Let's go back to Meltokio," Lloyd spoke firing up the flying machine.

After arriving at Meltokio and landing, the group entered the town. Zelos held Regal in his arms as he tried to walk along.

"Lloyd, I'm going to fall! This guy's heavy!" Zelos spoke shaking his knees. Lloyd and Sheena turned around.

"Be a man," Sheena spoke rolling her eyes and continued to walk to the Inn. Lloyd smirked and followed her. Zelos gave a huge sigh and continued followed by the other two girls.

"Can we have one room?" Lloyd asked the Inn manager. Zelos entered carrying Regal. His eyes darted at the brunette swordsman.

"Sure. That'll be 100 gald," The inn Manager told him with a smile. Lloyd grabbed out the money and passed it to her.

They carried Regal down to his room. Sheena opened the door as Zelos entered and shoved him on the bed.

"Now what?" Presea asked.

"Good question," Lloyd spoke.

"Let's just leave him here. When he wakes up he'll be fine," Zelos spoke rubbing his arms tiredly. Sheena and Colette nodded. The group exited the Inn.

"It's a beautiful day!" Colette spoke smelling the fresh air. She opened her arms and smiled into the sky.

Lloyd smiled at her happily.

"Get out of here you insane drunken man!" A shop keeper yelled. The group turned sharply as they heard the voice. Lloyd glanced around hastily.

"What was that?" Colette asked looking in the direction. Zelos shrugged his shoulder.

"Seems like a slum has gotten drunk, nothing unusual," Replied Zelos sighing. Sheena smiled at Lloyd and gave Zelos a sigh.

"Where did that sound come from?" Asked Presea looking around.

Suddenly a blue haired man waltzed into the town's square. His shoulders wobbled and his legs shook madly. His eyes were heavy and his clothes were all wet.

"Yuan?!" Lloyd stammered.

Colette starred at Yuan and ran over.

"Are you ok?" She asked.

Yuan looked up at her and bobbled his head.

"I think he's drunk," Laughed Zelos. He walked over to the Cruxis Angel and smiled.

"Who's high and mighty now?" Zelos spoke poking Yuan on the head. Sheena glared at Zelos as Presea giggled.

Yuan stammered for a minute and gained control. He starred at the Chosen and grabbed him by the red hair.

"What the hell did you do that for?" Yuan demanded. He looked down at his wet clothes and pulled back.

"What the…" He spoke glancing downwards.

Colette and Lloyd began to laugh crazily.

"It's not funny!" The seraphim demanded.

"Banana Slices right?" Zelos asked escaping Yuan's grasp on his hair. The seraphim turned to him and gave an evil scowl.

"And what of it?" Yuan asked.

"They have weird affects on people, kind of like what happened to you," Zelos pointed out.

"Why are you here anyways?" Lloyd asked starring at the man.

Yuan glanced over at Lloyd. He stroked his chin and glanced at his old friend's son.

"I'm not actually sure, maybe the author had something to do with it?" Yuan spoke glancing around. He then scratched his head.

"I remember now! I wanted some tuna…" Yuan spoke looking at the others. Sheena glanced at the Leader of The Renegades and snickered.

"You like Tuna?" She asked.

"Yes…" He replied, unsure what the problem was. He crossed his arms as his clothes finally began to dry off.

Colette giggled as he leaned into Lloyd's shoulder. Lloyd looked down at her and smiled. He turned his attention to Yuan. Suspiciously, he glared at him.

"That's all? You came all this way for tuna?" Lloyd spoke unsure he believed Yuan's story.

"I tell you, all I wanted as Tuna, of course then I remember buying a dessert with the Tuna, then everything went blank and that leads me to you goons finding me," He explained. His words were sharp and harsh.

Presea frowned at what Yuan said. She tilted her head an sighed.

"So…you like Tuna," Presea spoke.

Yuan angrily yelled.

"I just told you that!"

"I didn't hear," Presea replied.

"Sure…" Yuan spoke rolling his eyes.

Zelos, getting sick and tired of the fighting, grabbed a Banana Slice he had left and shoved it in Yuan's mouth. The whole group starred at the foolish Chosen.

"You do realize once he turns back to normal he'll kick your ass," Sheena spoke towards Zelos. Colette nodded.

"Uh, of course I do," Zelos spoke hesitating. Presea smiled weekly.

Yuan glanced at everyone. Lloyd starred at the Cruxis Angel not sure what the Banana Slice would do to him. Sheena also starred at Yuan wearily. Zelos stood proudly, as if he won some kind of reward. Presea stood there, dreading the worst.

Yuan's eyes bulged as he bursted out.

"RIBBIT!" He yelled hoping around.

"He's acting like… a frog?" Presea questioned watching Yuan hop around madly. Zelos burst out laughing as he used Lloyd's shoulder as a support to hold him up.

"Who would have thought," Colette added.

The group continued to watch Yuan jump around ribbiting. It was sort of comical in a way.

"I am Yuan, private eye," Yuan suddenly yelled out. Sheena glanced over.

"So much with the frog," She muttered watching Yuan run about acting like a spy. Lloyd grinned and turned to Colette.

"It's actually amusing to watch Yuan act like this seeing he's always serious," Lloyd spoke in direct to Colette. The blonde chosen gave a nod and walked over to Yuan.

"Are you alright?' She asked tilting her head.

"SUPERYUAN, To the rescue!" Yuan spoke using his cape as wings. Even Colette was frightened by this.

"Lloyd?" Colette spoke looking over.

"Yea?" He asked slowly.

"We have a serious problem," She announced.

**Author's Note:**

Was it good? Did you like it? Did Yuan's Banana Slice affect make you laugh? Was this story horrible? Should I re do this chapter? Please tell me in your review. I hope you all liked it, I hate to disappoint people.


	7. The Foot and a Dance

Banana Slices Chapter Seven is in! This time it shall feature Kratos. If you're wondering how the heck he got back from Derris Kharlen I shall explain in the story. It's actually a quite funny story. ::smiles:: Anyways, thanks for all the reviews. I know I got a flame but hey, all writers have flames at some point. It's just the unconstructive flames with no suggestions or meanings that I am annoyed at. Well, anyways, enough rambling from me, on with Chapter Seven!

* * *

Banana Slices

Chapter Seven: The Foot and a Dance

* * *

Lloyd shrugged at the blonde Chosen. He turned to the others for any suggestions. They didn't see Lloyd turn because they were watching Yuan run about flapping his cape.

"Your right Colette," Lloyd answered.

"Maybe we should do what we did to Regal?" She inquired looking over to Lloyd. Lloyd hesitated and sighed.

"I don't really feel like smacking Yuan upside the head," He spoke lowering his head and thinking if Renegade Leader found out Lloyd smacked him. Colette looked at Lloyd and sighed.

"I suppose you're right," She replied walking over to Sheena, Zelos, and Presea.

"Do you guys have any ideas on how to solve this issue?" She asked them clasping her hands together. The group shook their heads in unison and sighed. Colette gave a frown and walked slowly back to Lloyd.

"No one knows what to do," She replied. That's when it hit her like, like ::insert scenes of when Colette falls:: like tripping over a rock!

"How about we get him some Tuna. He said he came here for some, maybe it'll snap him out of this effect," Colette spoke gleaming. Zelos walked over to Lloyd and Colette and placed a hand on Colette's shoulder.

"That's a great idea hunny!" Zelos spoke widly. Lloyd gave a glare at Zelos and turned to Sheena and Presea.

"Any objections?" He asked them. Sheena and Presea shook their heads.

"It's the best idea we've had so far," Sheena replied.

"Chance of success is 72.5," Presea spoke to Lloyd. Lloyd gave a meek smile and turned to the rest of the group.

"So where are we going to find some tuna?" Lloyd asked. Zelos shrugged as Colette began to jump up and down.

"The Market!" She exclaimed happily. Zelos smiled as the rest nodded.

"That's a great idea!" Sheena spoke happily. She looked towards Yuan who was running around with a tree branch now.

"And we better hurry," Sheena added quickly.

Lloyd nodded as the group head down Meltokio's market street looking for some tuna.

"Get your Hot Fresh Bread!" A merchant called out as the group passed them by. Colette turned her head to the man.

"That's sounds good," She spoke stopping and walking over. Lloyd noticed Colette walk away so he stopped the others and walked back to Colette.

"Colette, we are looking for Tuna, not bread," he spoke hastily. Colette nodded apologetic and followed the others.

"Why is it so damn hard to find tuna?!" Sheena groaned to Presea. Presea tilted her head.

"it does not make any sense, Sheena. Meltokio is close by the water," The Tacten girl explained. Sheena gave a nod in agreement.

"Maybe Yuan got all the fish before us," Zelos joked walking in-between the two girls.

"Doubt it," Lloyd added in turning around to the three. Colette did not turn around, but scanned the side shops for a sign that said Seafood.

"I'm tired of this," Presea complained.

"I agree," Sheena added in looking towards Lloyd.

"I agree with my hunnies," Zelos spoke sweating.

"Come on! Do you seriously want Yuan to go insane?" Lloyd asked. He wasn't really looking for an answer.

"Well…"Zelos began stroking his chin. All of a sudden a heavy object hit Zelos in the back sending the red head into the ground face first. Sheena and Presea jerked backwards at the sudden jolt. Lloyd turned around sharply and Colette turned only her head.

"What the hell was that?!" Zelos spoke rubbing his back as he got to his knees. Sheena giggled then noticed what hit him. Her face went pale. Presea looked too and titled her head.

"Impossible," She spoke in a whisper.

"KRATOS?!" Lloyd barked staring at the man raising to his feet. Colette smiled and walked over to Kratos.

"Kratos! Good to see you," She spoke happily. Kratos swiped of the dirt from his lilac clothes and turned to The blonde Chosen.

"Lloyd, good to see you," He spoke hesitant. He rubbed his auburn hair as Zelos furiously went straight to his face.

"Why the heck did you knock me over?" Zelos demanded. His eyes starred angrily at the man. Lloyd looked towards Zelos.

"Yea, I mean it's great to see you, but how did you get here?" Lloyd asked as Sheena, Presea, and Colette joined by his side.

"The strangest thing. I was on Derris Kharlen and all of a sudden I was jolted here by…" He paused and starred at the others. Lloyd nodded and waited for the rest.

"By what?" Sheena asked.

"it seemed to me like a giant foot," The man spoke with a slight sweat drop. Presea starred at Kratos in disbelief.

"The chances of that happening are .1 percent," She exclaimed. Lloyd, utterly confused, starred at him.

"Are you joking or something?" Lloyd questioned, still in dismay.

"I'm not joking!' Kratos spoke stubbornly. Zelos starred at Kratos and joined the others.

"That's kind of hard to believe," Zelos replied.

"Believe it or not, that's how I got here," he replied.

"We don't have time for this! What about the tuna!" Colette whined turning to Sheena. Sheena gave a quick nod and nudged Lloyd hard.

"We have to hurry before Yuan does something he regrets," Sheena spoke. Kratos' eyes starred at the ninja.

"What about Yuan?" He inquired. Presea turned to Kratos.

"He's gone insane from these fruit items called 'Banana Slices' and is running around town like a complete crazed person," She explained. Kratos gave a short chuckle and turned to them.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to accompany you for this short while, It's a rare sight to see Yuan anything but depressed," Kratos spoke holding his weapon. Lloyd smiled.

"Of course you can!' Lloyd spoke happily. Presea gave her approval and Zelos muttered something under his breath.

"So where do we find this tuna?" Zelos asked. Kratos turned to him.

"Tuna?" He asked confused.

"Yes tuna" Replied Zelos.

"what do you want tuna for?" Asked Kratos puzzled. Presea answered this question.

"Yuan said he came here for tuna so we thought if we gave him some he'd calm down," Presea replied.

"How will that help?" Kratos asked.

"Good point," Sheena spoke.

"Never thought of that…"Lloyd spoke seemingly embarrassed.

"To calm him down just give him this," Kratos spoke passing Lloyd a blue sphere. Zelos looked over Lloyd's shoulder at the sphere. The red head Chosen gave a puzzled look.

"And we do what with this?" Zelos asked sassily.

"Just put it in his hands. It was made from Ocean Mana and contains minerals to relax people," Explained the mercenary. Colette nodded happily.

"That solves everything!" She spoke overjoyed. Presea grinned and turned to Sheena.

"Do you think this will work?" She asked the black haired girl.

"Hope so," Sheena replied.

Lloyd flipped the sphere in his hands. He turned to Kratos with a big grin.

"Thanks Kratos," He spoke happily.

"Well let's go already, we have a maniac to save!" Zelos reminded them. Sheena nodded and turned to Lloyd.

"Come on Lloyd, let's hurry," She spoke in agreement with Zelos. Presea and Colette followed Sheena and Zelos and Lloyd.

When they arrived back at the scene where they left Yuan all they saw were flowers on the ground spreaded a round. A faint sound was heard getting louder every second. Presea grabbed her ax and looked around.

"What is that?" Sheena asked Colette. Colette shook her head and turned to Kratos.

"Kratos, what is that?" Colette asked wearily. Lloyd looked around and noticed a big crowd gathering.

"I think we found Yuan," Lloyd spoke beginning to walk over. Zelos, Kratos, and the girls followed close behind his paces.

Lloyd tried to look over some man who was blocking his view.

" I can't see over that persons head" He spoke to the group. Zelos sighed and snapped his fingers.

"Zelos Wilder, The Chosen one, coming through," He chimed. The crowd immediately moved aside to let the group through.

"How did you do that?" Lloyd asked beginning to go through the crowd.

"One of the only things that's good with being the Chosen," He spoke with a sigh as Colette walked close.

"Um, Lloyd," Sheena spoke all of a sudden. Lloyd turned to her. He starred at her face. Her eyes were starring blankly ahead. He glanced to where she was looking and froze.

"What the.." He began. Kratos glanced over and shook his head.

"Botta is alive!?" Colette yelled out as Presea turned in the direction of the others.

Set in the front of the crowd was a stage. On the stage were two speaking devices and right in the middle of the stage was Botta. Not just Botta standing there but Botta Irish step dancing in a skirt! I mean kilt!

"That's just wrong…"Sheena spoke covering her eyes with her hand. Colette giggled with Presea as the three guys

"…" Kratos just starred onto the stage.

"He is so copying me," Zelos spoke outraged. The group turned their attention to Zelos.

"You mean you Irish step dance in a skirt?" Presea asked Zelos. Zelos' face went beat red as he brushed his hand through his hair and glanced at everyone.

"Maybe…" He spoke turning back to the stage.

"And where's Yuan?" Colette asked looking around for the blue haired Cruxis Angel.

"I think we just found out…" Sheena spoke almost falling over laughing. Lloyd and Kratos turned to her and what she was laughing out. Now on stage was both Yuan and Botta Irish Step Dancing. Yuan wasn't in a kilt though.

"Oh my Martel, this is funnier then cable TV!" Lloyd spoke kneeling over laughing.

"But I love cable TV," Colette added to Lloyd's statement.

"Grab the sphere Lloyd and hurry!" Kratos hollered to his son. Lloyd nodded and ran up on the stage. A few girls In the audience shrilled happily.

"Now there is three!" One cried out in pleasure waving her hand to Lloyd. Lloyd blushing a little, turned to Yuan and slammed the blue sphere into his hand.

Yuan's eyes went blank. He stood there for a few minutes as the others waited on baited breath. Meanwhile, Botta continued to Step Dance oddly.

"Yuan?" Lloyd asked.

"Is he ok now?" Presea asked Zelos.

"Ask Kratos that," Zelos replied.

Presea turned to Kratos.

"Is he ok?" She asked him tilting her head.

"I believe so," Kratos answered silently.

Colette turned to Sheena.

"I hope he's ok now," She spoke worriedly. Sheena looked over at Colette.

"Same here, oddly," Sheena replied sighing.

Yuan suddenly regained control and looked around and turned to Lloyd and whispered in a stubborn voice.

"And why the hell am I on stage…" He asked gritting his teeth. Lloyd grinned.

"Well you were just step dancing a minute ago," Lloyd answered smiling to the group. Yuan gritted his teeth more and then noticed Botta dancing.

"Botta!" Yuan spoke startled. Botta ignored him and continued his jig. Yuan shook his head and left the stage from the left.

"Geez and no thanks?" Lloyd spoke watching the man leave.

"Wait Yuan" Colette called walking over to him. The man stopped abruptly for a second. She smiled at him and passed him a large tuna. Kratos and Zelos starred at Colette and shook their heads at her.

"Is this tuna?" He asked staring at her.

"Yep!" She replied happily.

Yuan gave her and the others and suspicious glance.

"Thanks…"He muttered under his breath so no one could hear. He turned around and was off. Lloyd walked off stage to Presea.

"Wow, a silent thanks," Lloyd muttered.

"At least he thanked us," Presea answered turning to him.

"Lloyd," Kratos spoke. Lloyd turned to Kratos.

"I just thought of something seeing I've heard you all fell under the spell of these 'Banana Slices'," Kratos began.

"What is it Kratos?" Lloyd inquired.

"What about Genis and Raine?" The mercenary asked. Lloyd's face went pale.

"Oh damn we forgot about them!" Lloyd spoke to the others. The group gave a startled and pale look.

* * *

**Authors' Note:**

**This is the longest Chapter I've ever written. Did you like the tuna? Did you like the foot? Did you like Botta Irish Step dancing? (I got the Irish Step Dancing from a dream I had about Botta 0.o) Please R&R and tell me what you think**


	8. Once a teacher Now a Birdie

**YAY! I'm on my second out of six stories to do today! Maybe I shouldn't have uploaded so many ::ponders:: Anyways, I hope you like chapter either and Raine's and Genis' Banana Slices effects. And thanks to a reviewer, I shall put Kratos under the spell of Banana Slices for a part of the story! Please read my other stories if you like my writings ::has stars in eyes::**

**Nall: You're insane**

**Me: Well duh Nall! I wrote this and 'Potato Madness' what do you think I am? Sane?**

**Nall: I was hoping you were…**

**Me: You are so hurtful! ::closes eyes::**

**Nall: This is why you shall never get to me.**

**Me: Oh be quiet and do my disclaimer!**

**Nall: Katra owns nothing she is writing. She only thinks of this because she has no life besides writing.**

**Me: That….was cruel…anyways here it is!

* * *

**

**Banana Slices**

**Chapter Eight: Once a Teacher Now a Birdie

* * *

**

They group exchanged worried glanced. How could they have forgotten about the Professor and Genis?! Lloyd starred at Kratos then to Colette.

"What do we do now?" Asked Lloyd, sweating. Kratos looked over at his son.

"I purpose we go see them before these 'Banana Slices' take effect on them," Kratos suggested. Zelos turned to him.

"You know, you can be very helpful at times," The Chosen spoke. Kratos gave a confused look and cleared his throat.

"I'm not sure to take that as a compliment or a diss?" He asked in a harsh tone. Zelos lowered his gaze. Sheena turned to them.

"I hate to do this but I have to go and check on Mizuho. I'll be back later, I'm sorry," Sheena spoke lowering her gaze. She crossed her arms. Colette turned to her.

"That's ok Sheena," Colette said placing a hand on her shoulder. Sheena smiled at the blonde Chosen and left Meltokio.

Presea turned to the others.

"So our best bet like Kratos said is to go see Genis and Raine?" She asked taking out her ax and gently holding it. Lloyd gave a nod to the Tacten girl.

"I suggest we hurry," Kratos spoke. The group nodded and ran out of the town, still leaving Botta dancing and Regal sleeping. The each got on a Rheaird and left to Iselia. Lloyd and the others reached the teleportation light at The Renegade Base and paused.

"What's wrong?" Zelos asked as he called up to them.

"I was wondering if Yuan is angry at us," Lloyd called back.

"Why would he?" Presea asked.

"Oh, it's nothing," he muttered.

"Let's just get moving," Kratos spoke scratching his auburn head as his eyes twitched.

"What's wrong with your eye?" Presea asked. Zelos looked over.

"I thought I saw Genis and Raine down there," Kratos spoke glancing back downwards. Zelos looked down also and suddenly got dizzy.

"too high…"the Chosen muttered as his eyes began to shut. Colette looked over as Zelos began to fall from his Rheaird.

"LLOYD"! Colette yelled to Lloyd. Lloyd just noticed Zelos falling as Colette yelled. He set his Rheaird for full blast and went downwards trying to catch Zelos before he called. It was all over. Zelos was going to fall and die. He was going to the watery grave. To the Big House. To the Jailhouse. To The Bazooka land!

"Raine the super birdie to the rescue!' Raine screamed as she came running out of nowhere and caught Zelos. The whole group was stunned.

"RAINE?!" Zelos spoke jumping out of her arms and giving her a huge hug for saving him. Something different was about her. Something very different. Something no one could put their finger on, well maybe it was the fact she was wearing a chicken costume!

"Erm…Raine, my ultra cool beauty, why are you dressed up like a chicken?" He asked sweating. The others landed next to Zelos and was stunned by Raine.

"I am not a chicken!" She spoke in a clucking voice. Lloyd was completely stunned.

"My Teacher is a Chicken…." He spoke trying to comprehend what the hell was going on.

"Once a Teacher Now a Birdie," Kratos said to himself. Zelos looked over.

"You mean Chicken," Zelos stated. Raine flapped her chicken like wings and gobbled at them.

"Does she have rabbis?" Zelos asked jumping behind Colette. Colette looked at Zelos and gave a week smile towards gim.

"CLUCK!" She yelled acting as if her nose was a beak. She then proceeded to chase Zelos around the small island. All Lloyd could say about this act of stupidity was, "Colette! Go get some popcorn!"

"Someone, help me!" Zelos yelled running around crazily. Presea covered her mouth from laughing. Kratos rolled his eyes finding nothing funny about this.

Raine then jumped into the air and began to chuck eggs at Zelos. Yes it is very wrong.

"This just get stranger and stranger," Kratos spoke crossing his arms.

"She's gone insane!" Zelos yelled as an egg smashed on his head. All his red hair was covered in egg yolk. He looked over at Raine and gave a puppy dog face.

"That was so uncalled for," He spoke sad but angry. Lloyd fell over laughing as Raine then began to chase him again.

"This is absurd!" Kratos spoke taking out his sword.

"No Kratos, this is for every time Zelos was an idiot," Lloyd spoke looking up towards him. Kratos crossed his arms and grinned.

"I suppose you're right," He spoke. Just then Genis appeared.

"Genis!" Colette called out happily running to the half elf.

"Stay away you evil alien!" he yelled getting out his kandama. Colette took a step backwards as everyone but Zelos and Raine looked over at Genis.

"Alien?" Kratos asked.

"Yes yes! You all are aliens! You must die!" He yelled at the top of his lungs. He began to cast Thunder Blade at the group. Lloyd yelled out in fear.

"This just went from funny to dangerous!" He yelled. Zelos looked over as he was running.

"Now you know who I feel!" The Chosen muttered avoiding eggs of doom. Genis suddenly stopped and sat down in a corner and began to mutter to himself.

"I don't want the cough medicine mommy! I don't want it!" He spoke talking nonsense. The group stopped and caught their breaths.

"Is he alright?" Colette asked Kratos.

"It would appear he is having illusions," Kratos stated. Lloyd starred at Genis.

"Let me guess, they had a Banana Slice right?" Lloyd spoke sweating. Presea nodded.

"More then likely," The young girl spoke. Colette sighed heavily and looked at Raine then Genis.

"Let's see. Maybe we can snap them out of it!" She spoke happily. She clasped her hands together as she thought.

"Why does she do that?" Kratos asked.

"Because she's Colette," Lloyd answered.

Kratos suddenly fell to the floor.

"KRATOS!" Presea yelled. Everything turned into a soap opera with Raine chasing Zelos in slow motion.

"What happened to him?" Lloyd asked dressed up in a spiffy outfit.

"He was murdered!" Presea spoke with death in her eyes. Colette took a step backwards.

"By whom?" Colette asked.

"Well he has something on his face," Presea spoke bending over.

"What doctor?! What is it?" Lloyd asked getting on his knees.

"He's been shot in the face by a banana Slice," Presea spoke.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Lloyd yelled on his knees bending over Kratos crying. Colette buried her head into Presea's shoulder.

Everything went back to normal.

"Banana Slices again?!" Lloyd asked angrily. These things were causing more trouble then what they were worth.

Kratos slowly got up and felt his head.

"Dammit, I don't want to know what is going to happen to Kratos," Lloyd spoke. Kratos looked over at Lloyd.

"I like pointy things," He spoke In a bizarre squeaky voice. Lloyd starred at Kratos blankly.

"I've lost all confidence as a man," he spoke lowering his head. Colette starred at him.

"Lloyd! You said that line before!" Colette yelled smacking him on the head. Kratos began to wander off and poked pointy things, like like…The Empire State Building! Like Yuan's Hair!

"My hair is no pointy!' Yuan screamed as Kratos poked it. And he poked other things like. A butterfly! And then he poked Botta Irish Step Dancing.

"This is going to be a LOONG night," Lloyd complained.

**Author's Note:**

**Sorry to cut this short. My imagination went blank. Anyways, I hope that the next chapter will be even more hilarious! Did you like Raine acting like a chicken? Was Genis funny? Was Kratos and his pointy thing and poking obsession funny? Please Review!**


	9. When Chickens go BAD and or Good Bye New...

**Banana Slices Chapter Nine is in! I GOT TO NALL! I got Kratos to win Advanced Class in the Coliseum! You rock Kratos!**

**Nall: Idiot…**

**Me: In this chappie… Presea knocks on a door, a lot! This chappie also has just a TAD bit of Gesea… But it's just Genis crush thing! Don't worry!**

**Nall: Like they needed to know that?**

**Me: Let's just start since you love to make fun of me. And George Bush is NOT the president in this story. Some guy named Bob Bob is…**

**Banana Slices**

**Chapter Ten: Pointy Thing and Good Bye New York!**

"Where did Kratos go?" Colette asked Lloyd. The brunette swordsman turned to the blonde Chosen and looked around.

"Probably went to go poke pointy things," Lloyd suggested. Colette gave a huge sigh. Presea walked over to the two.

"It seems Raine is still chasing Zelos," Presea reported. Lloyd glanced over at Raine still chucking random objects at Zelos. By now Zelos was covered in egg, soup, and yes mashed potatoes!

"Where did these stupid Banana Slices even come from?" Lloyd asked angrily. Presea gave a shrug along with Colette.

"Well Zelos said they come from 'Earth'," Replied Colette clasping her hands together.

"And that really helps," Lloyd spoke in a sarcastic way. Colette lowered her head sadly. She clasped her hands together and closed her eyes.

"I'm sorry Lloyd," She spoke in a whisper. Presea turned to Colette.

"I assume Lloyd is not angry, just aggravated," Presea spoke trying to make sense Of Lloyd's actions towards his best friend.

"Yea, what Presea said," Lloyd spoke sweating. All of a sudden Yuan busted out of the base with a angry look upon his face. Following the seraphim was Kratos.

"Yuan! Kratos?" Lloyd spoke confused. Yuan stomped over to Lloyd and took out his weapon.

"Is this some kind of a joke!" Yuan demanded pointing to Kratos who was twiddling his thumbs and poking rocks. Presea looked over at Yuan.

"Kratos fell under the spell of Banana Slices from an unknown cause," She explained. Yuan gave her a confused look and grabbed Kratos by his auburn hair.

"Whatever happened, I suggest you fix him before he goes destroying my base again!" Yuan hollered. Kratos starred at them and tried to poke Yuan's shoe.

"He did what!" Lloyd spoke alarmed.

"He destroyed my base!" Yuan restated.

"Maybe you should have put more security on it," Colette spoke with a concerned look on her face. Yuan looked over at the Chosen Of mana and rolled his emerald eyes.

"Fix him, or suffer the consequences!" Yuan stammered.

"Consequences?" Lloyd asked. Presea turned to Lloyd.

"Yuan has no set consequences," Replied Presea.

"ooh," Lloyd spoke with a grin. He crossed his arms like Kratos used to do. Yuan pulled his weapon to Lloyd's throat, raised an eyebrow, muttered something then walked back into the base dropping Kratos in the snow.

"Well, he's really friendly!" Lloyd muttered. Zelos, who was still be chased by Miss Chicken toppled over Kratos.

"CLUCK!" Raine yelled jumping onto Zelos. Kratos stood up and poked Raine.

"CLUCK?" She yelled turning to Kratos. He starred at her and poked one of her feathers. Presea, Colette, and Lloyd exchanged looks. Kratos looked at Presea, titled his head and ran off with his Rheaird.

"Where is he going?" Lloyd asked. Colette gave a meek smile towards Lloyd.

"I hope he'll be ok," She replied.

"Me too," Lloyd spoke in almost a whisper.

-Meanwhile-

Kratos was going on a Earth and Symphonia poking spree! First he poked the Eiffel Tower! Then he poked White House! Then he poked The Tethe'alle base! All of these places he received these wonderful pictures. But in these pictures he was jumbo size…how bizarre… then suddenly he went inside the White house again!

Kratos slowly walked through the white house hall. Where were the security guards you might wonder? They were all eating lunch at a restaurant of course! How convenient, for our weird hero! Finally he made his way into the President's office. At the desk was the president, Bob and his last name was Bob.

"Who the hell are you?" Bob bob asked.

"Oooh what does the red button do!" Kratos asked walking over twiddling his thumbs. He walked over to the big red button.

"What are you doing in my office! Get the hell out of my office!" Bob yelled.

Kratos then poked the Big Red Button. Then then,

Da da da da, la la la la, hey hey hey hey Good Bye to New York!

And with that New York went CABOMB! Well, everyone got out safe with no injuries except those people who I hate and are evil!

"You just blew up New York!" Bob yelled.

"What's New York?" Kratos asked.

-Back to our REAL heroes… and the chicken lady-

"I thought I heard something," Colette spoke looking around. Lloyd flicked his ear and tilted his head.

"You did? I didn't" Lloyd replied still trying to figure out what Colette heard. Presea looked around and went up the Renegade Base Door.

_Knock knock_

"What are you doing Presea?" Lloyd asked looking over.

_Knock knock_

"Presea?" Colette asked looking over at her.

_Knock knock_

"Come on Presea, stop that," Lloyd demanded. Presea turned to him, gave a big grin then turned to the door. (PREPARE YOURSELF!)

_Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK Knock knock KNOCK_

"Is she ok?" Lloyd asked with a sweat drop. Colette giggled and walked over to her. Just then Yuan busted out of the base sending Presea toppling into the snow.

"Who the hell was just doing all that god damn knocking?" Yuan screamed angrily. Lloyd and Colette laughed and pointed to Presea who had gotten up and began to Knock again.

"HER!" Yuan glared angrily as he picked her up by the back of her collar with his right hand. Presea squirmed in his hand but was still smiling widely at what she had just done.

"…Presea?" Genis finally spoke standing up. His eyes returned to normal as he ran over to the others. He saw Yuan holding Presea above the ground and almost died.

"Let her go!" Genis demanded.

"And what if I don't?" Yuan taunted.

"I'll make you toast!" Genis threatened shaking his kandama nervously.

"Not toast!" Yuan spoke in a sarcastic way. He rolled his eyes and chucked her in the air. Genis ran to the flying Presea and managed to catch her. Just then his legs gave way from her wait as they both landed in the snow.

"Was that supposed to happen?" Colette asked Lloyd turning to him. Lloyd shook his head and turned to Zelos and Raine.

"Cluck! (Come my Chicken Friends!)" Raine yelled in a chicken voice. Lloyd and Colette exchanged glances. Suddenly fifty chickens from those Zelda games that come out of nowhere if you smack a chicken with your sword, swooped down and began to peck Zelos crazily.

"Get them off!" Zelos hollered holding his head and running around. Genis looked over at his sister and sprang to his feet.

"GO RAINE! YOU ROCK!" He yelled as he cheered her on. Lloyd turned to his friend with a grin.

"Heh, I didn't expect that response from you," Replied Lloyd.

"Why in the name of Martel are chickens invading my base!" Yuan yelled running back outside with a chicken at his feet. His hair had random feathers in it. He had that very tense and annoyed look.

"What happened Yuan?" Colette inquired worriedly looking over. Lloyd gave her a sigh and glanced back over at the seraphim.

"What do you think happened! These damn chickens ruined my base!" He hollered grabbing the chicken at his feet and flying it through the air into the water.

"It's a new sport! Chicken Throw!" Lloyd spoke with a grin watching the chicken sail through the sky and into the icy cold water.

"That's cruel," Colette protested. Yuan glanced at the young girl.

"Cruel? I'll tell you 'cruel'. Cruel is what happened to me!" Yuan spoke squinting his emerald eyes. He glanced at the group and began to brush off the feathers that were on his cape.

"I have a question," Genis said speaking up. They turned to the half-elf.

"And that is?" Yuan asked, annoyed.

"How could chicken's destroy your base? All they can do is excretion and shed feathers," Genis explained curiously.

"Question!' Lloyd spoke raising his hand and turning to his best friend.

"What?" Genis asked looking over at Lloyd.

"What's excretion?..." He asked very clueless like. Colette blushed and began to giggle. Yuan gave them all a odd look and rolled his emerald eyes.

"When you go to the bathroom Lloyd," Genis spoke puffing out his cheeks as he spoke in a whisper. His whole face turned beat read from his older friend's stupidity.

"Well, to answer your earlier question before you were so rudely interrupted, I suggest you come with me," Yuan spoke watching Presea, Genis, Lloyd and Colette. They all nodded and walked behind Yuan into the ruined and mostly destroyed base. Raine and Zelos however, continued their quarrel, I mean um, chase.

"This place is horrible!' Colette shrieked wide eyes. It was true, the whole place was on fire, destroyed, and chicken's marched around carrying little flags that had a egg symbol on them.

"Chicken's conquered the world's best military thing? I'm scared…" Lloyd spoke trying not to break out in laughter. Genis didn't find this either. Presea watched the chicken's in puzzlement.

Author's note:

This chapter took me long enough. I have a quick question for Lunar Fans. Are Leo and Gwyn, both from Lunar 2 Eternal Blue, related? I haven't beaten the game but I have a hunch they are. I mean the same nose, same type of ears, Gwyn has white fur on his hands, Leo has black, and they fight like father and son. So are they?

Anyways I'm so sorry I haven't been on. My mind has been on other things.

Nall: BULL! You have just been too busy playing on neopets and you are too damn lazy to write.

Me: Don't make me get the pictures!

Nall: Of what?...

Me: You know. The ones with you in a maids suit, with water ALL over you!

Nall: shudders I still hate you for that.

Me: HURRAY! My muse hates me! Anyways I better go.

Nall: She's lying again

Me: BE QUIET! chucks Nall in maid's outfit pictures at you and runs off


	10. World Domination! And Hot Wings!

**Banana Slices Ten:: crowd cheers loudly : What? I've been gone that long? Ok, thanks to some funky inspiration from my other stories. This chapter is mostly dedicated to Michelle and Nicole. This doesn't mean it's only for them tho! It's just because they always support me when I'm sad. And erm : covers ears : I have a few family problems. Not parent problems but, other problems. Eek!**

**Nall: Are you always going to rant?**

**Me: Shut up Nall! This is a very hard time in my family. So shut it and let me rant …**

**Nall: Ok, when Kat is mad, she is very scary. Scary like Catwoman. **

**Me: Really. Just be quiet. Or Or, I'll get Raine the Chicken Lady in here! I'm serious Nall!**

**Nall: Will she throw eggs at me:: gulp :**

**Me: yes! So be quiet and let's on with the story already!**

**Nall: You're the one who keeps ranting..**

**Me: Be quiet…**

**Banana Slices**

**Chapter 10: World Domination! And Hot Wings!**

The chicken's continued their march through the base and into the secret room. The room off limits to everyone except Yuan.

"So, Yuan, what are you going to do now?" Lloyd spoke trying to grin. Colette glanced over at Lloyd and acted confused.

"What are you going to do now? I'll tell you what you are going to do now! You all are going to help me get these damn chickens out of here, fix Kratos before he does something really idiotic, and explain to me what the hell is going on around here!" Yuan spoke exasperated. He twitched his emerald eyes and crossed his arms. Colette turned to Yuan.

"To answer the question about what's going on, it's because of these 'Banana Slices'. You see, they control people and give weird side effects. And every time some0ne eats one, it's always a different effect." Colette tried to explain flapping her purple and pink wings. Presea nodded in agreement.

"So that's why I was on stage," Yuan muttered to himself. Lloyd turned to the seraphim.

"What was that?" Lloyd asked puzzled. Yuan starred at him.

"Nothing," Replied Yuan sharply.

"Hey what's this?" Genis spoke picking up a small electronic device. Yuan noticed Genis picking up the device and rushed over. With one swift move, Yuan snatched it out of his hands.

"It's nothing," Replied Yuan hiding it.

"Looks like a device to talk to people," Replied Genis wanting to study it.

"You're starting to sound like Raine," Replied Lloyd with a huge sigh.

"It's a cell phone, ok! It's the only way I can talk to people!" Yuan spoke to the group. A few chickens passed by dressed up like Colette.

"What the heck?" Genis screamed. Yuan sharply turned to him and made a fist.

"Look Colette! They're your fans!" Lloyd spoke pointing to the chickens. Colette blushed and smiled.

"They are so cute Lloyd!" Colette spoke grinning at Lloyd.

"I'm back! What did I mi-" Sheena spoke re appearing in a puff of smoke. Before she could even finish her sentence, she saw chickens walk by.

"Chickens?" Sheena spoke alarmed.

"Sheena! You're back." Presea spoke to the girl. Sheena nodded and turned to Yuan who was yelling at Genis.

"What's wrong with you?" Sheena asked walking over to the two half-elves.

"He won't let me look at this device called a 'cell phone'," Genis explained. Yuan snickered.

"Because it's mine and I don't want grimy hands on my merchandise," Yuan retorted holding the cell phone proudly. Sheena began to fall over laughing.

"Cell phones! All the people of Mizuho have those! And you two are fighting over them," Sheena spoke between laughs. Genis turned to Yuan and gave a huge stupid grin.

"Guess it isn't that special anymore," Genis replied to Yuan. Yuan arched his eyebrows.

"Now can I see it?" Genis spoke staring at the older half-elf with stars in his eyes. Yuan stepped back, hesitantly he chucked it towards Genis to look at. Genis thanked him and began to investigate the phone.

"Whoa, look Lloyd! The chickens are all grouped in a circle!" Colette spoke pointing to a large gathering of chickens. The whole group, except Genis and Yuan and Yuan's cell phone, turned to see what Colette was talking about. Before anyone could say anything, Genis dropped the cell phone in horror.

"YOU BROKE IT!" he yelled in fury.

"You have how many picture messages from Mithos!" Genis spoke in shock. Yuan glanced at him, stuttering.

"Well um, I um, well it's a long story starting with, oh, why am I telling YOU this you little twerp! I outta-" Yuan began.

"And they all say 'I LOOOOOVE YOU', what the hell!" Genis spoke holding his head. Yuan starred at the half-elf and smacked him on the head.

"Why did you do that?" Genis warned whining.

"Because, they are from Mithos, not from me." Yuan explained trying to cover up the facts. Genis scratched his chin, thinking to himself.

"But there was around 200 messages to a Chinese Restaurant, I didn't know you liked Chinese Food," Genis spoke with a slight smile. Yuan crossed his arms and puffed out his cheeks.

"Mithos did that," Yuan spoke. Genis, who found that extremely hard to believe, shrugged.

"But why did Mithos have your cellphone then?" Genis questioned.

"The same reason you have it, because you are both annoying, grimy-handed, little half-elves!" Yuan glared with anger.

"Um guys…." Zelos spoke walking over covered in tons of egg yolk. His hair was all messed up and he looked like a hobo who hadn't washed for days, who had rolled in a garabage can, and who had been living on a diet of toenails for all his life.

"Zelos! Hey where's Raine?" Lloyd spoke looking over at Zelos, holding back a grin.

"Over there with her 'minions'," Zelos spoke pointing. Yuan turned to Zelos and starred at him for a few moments.

"I'm not even going to ask," Yuan sharply said looking over at the chickens in the rather large, hideous looking group.

"What is she doing?" Presea asked Zelos poking him in the arm.

"She's planning an attack on the world of Tethe'alle," Zelos began before Lloyd rudely cut into Zelos' explanation like a knife through tapioca pudding.

"Planning an attack!" Lloyd screamed. Zelos smacked the younger swordsman on the head and covered his mouth.

"Shut it, they'll… oh shit, too late," Zelos spoke pointing. The others turned to where Zelos was pointing and stood there in horror. Over a million cuckoos and chickens were in the base, ready to attack. Each held a pitchfork, and wore a shiny helmet that had the Burger King emblem crossed out with permanent marker of doom! Raine, in the front, held her staff ready to cast spells.

"Get, ready.." Yuan spoke counting to three on his fingers. Lloyd nodded.

"Ready for what?" Colette asked, puzzled.

"Ready to run for the Rheairds," Lloyd whispered to her.

"CLUCK! CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK 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The chicken's screamed in rage as they charged to the group. Yuan screamed at the top of his lungs which oddly sounded like a young girl crying for her dolly. :-D

"THREE!"

And with that the group quickly ran to the Rheairds. Presea, Genis, and Zelos were the first ones to make it back. Sheena quickly followed and hopped onto a Rheaird with Zelos. Yuan grabbed his own while Lloyd and Colette ran towards them.

"Lloyd!" Colette yelled. Lloyd sharply turned around and saw Colette on the ground, holding her knee.

"Colette!" Lloyd spoke running back to aid her. Before he could grab her hand Kratos appeared wearing his white uniform. Flapping his blue wings, he turned to his son and Colette.

"Hurry!" He yelled grabbing his sword. Lloyd starred at his father and whispered thanks, silently like in one of those sad soap operas. Lloyd and Colette ran to the Rheaird and started the engine up. Sheena, Zelos, Colette, Lloyd, Presea, and Genis quickly flew away. Yuan was about to start up the engine when he noticed Kratos standing in front of the chicken's with his sword at hand.

"What the hell are you doing!" Yuan yelled starting the engine and hovering above. Kratos glanced up and noticed Yuan he sighed.

"Of all the people to be saved by, I would have never thought it would be you," Kratos told himself. Yuan twitched his emerald eye and chucked a hot wing at Kratos' head. Bending over and clutching his head, Kratos turned to the other, hot wing thrower, seraphim.

"In the name Of Martel, why did you do that?" Kratos spoke wincing. Yuan rolled his eyes and hovered back down to the ground.

"Get on The Rheaird. I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing it because you saved us, so swallow your pride and get on!" Yuan yelled. Kratos starred at him and got on the Rheaird and flew away from the base, but not that far.

"What are we going to do? If we allow them to corrupt this world, who knows what will happen," Kratos said holding his head in confusion. Yuan starred at him.

"They're chickens…" Yuan added. He continued on. "How could chickens corrupt this world?" He asked, filled with excitement to hear Kratos' reply.

"Mithos was a child, was he not?" Kratos explained her theory. Yuan, who still not understand Kratos' logic, nodded stiffly.

"Wait, never mind I lost my point," Kratos spoke with utter embarrassment. Yuan scowled but was silenced by the others flying next to them.

"Thank Martel you two are safe," Colette spoke praying to the goddess.

"Don't thank her yet," Mumbled Yuan. Lloyd turned to him, and sighed. Presea poked Lloyd in the shoulder.

"Lloyd, look, Raine looks like she wants to tell us something," Presea whispered into his ear. Lloyd nodded and fell silent.

Raine walked to the middle of the island followed by two chickens for protection. Her eyes glared at the others with deep evilness. Her feathers were flattened against her once, proud, clothes.

"Humans, we do not want to hurt you, all we want is the red-haired man, and we shall let you go freely," Raine announced pointing to Zelos. The Chosen's eyes went wide with sheer horror. Zelos turned to his companions.

"Guys, you wouldn't throw her over to me, would-"Zelos began to whine but could not finish before Lloyd chucked him to the ground. The red-haired chosen landed squarely, head first into the snow.

"Thanks a lot," He murmured. Raine silently walked over to him with the chickens glaring at Zelos, looking ready to pluck out his eyeballs at any second.

"Red hair man, I would like your hand in marriage," Raine finally said. All went silent, well all was silent, but you get the idea.

"WHAT!" Zelos yelled, springing his feet but slipped on the snow and fell into Raine's arms.

At their perch in the sky, Colette couldn't help but giggle. Sheena covered her mouth sharply and starred at the young girl.

"What's so funny, eh?" Sheena snapped angrily, her body tensed.

"Oh, Sheena, they make such a nice couple," Colette spoke admiring what she thought was an embrace down below. Sheena twitched her eye-brow and blared at her.

"YOU THINK WHAT!" Sheena screamed. Everyone, including Yuan and Kratos, who were eating hot wings, looked at her.

"… You ok Sheena?" Lloyd asked glancing over. Sheena blushed with furry.

"Ah just forget I said anything," She concluded angrily. The others shrugged, and fly down to and island about a mile away, completely forgetting about the chosen and his need of rescue. They all landed and pulled out lawn-chairs from the secret compartment in Yuan's pants, and relaxed.

"I never knew you had a secret compartment, Yuan," Genis spoke glancing over, finally speaking. Yuan scowled.

"Shut up," He muttered. With a shrug, Genis relaxed.

"This is… nice," Presea spoke grabbing sand in her hands and watching it fall to the ground, grain by grain. Kratos glanced over and admired the natural beauty of the land.

"oooooh coming through, sonny!" An old man spoke, suddenly appearing like magic. He held a number 2 pointy pencil with pink fuzz coiled around it. Kratos looked over.

"Aren't you Dr. Phil?" Kratos questioned.

"No, he's my second removed, mother's side, on her aunt side, her aunt's oddly identical twin's side, brother," The man spoke licking the pencil.

"You lost me even before you started to speak," Lloyd spoke. Colette ran over.

"OMIGOSH! You are like, so my uncle, twice removed, on my uncle dog side! Like, OMIGOSH! Don't you own Play Boy or sutthin?" Colette spoke embracing the man with hugs. The group starred at her oddly.

"Let's right hun, well I must be off to go meet some sexy girls, Ta ta!" The old man spoke as a hamburger blew up and he disappeared.

"Great, Colette speaks chat-speak," Lloyd sighed. Kratos glanced over and rubbed his chin.

"Play boy eh?" Kratos spoke to himself with a slight grin. Yuan's face went blank in horror.

Author's Note:

Lord Martel did that take me a long time! Well enjoy, I think. I hoped you liked it. Thanks to Nall and Michelle for some ideads. –squeezes Nall and pokes Yuan's 'secret compartment'. I wonder xD Next chapter soon since it's Summer!


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